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Cory Monteith passed away in 2013, but then-girlfriend Lea Michele has revealed she’s still yet to watch Glee’s emotional tribute to him.

The Canadian actor, who portrayed Finn Hudson on Glee, passed away on July 13, 2013 due to combined heroin and alcohol toxicity, writes the coroner’s report. His passing saw an outpouring of tributes from Hollywood, including at the Emmys and the Grammys.

Eyes were all on Lea, his then-girlfriend and on-screen love interest as Rachel Berry, who he planned a future with. The Broadway actress has bravely opened up about her loss and love for the Glee star over the years, revealing that they even discussed children and has continued to honor her former beau every year since.

There is one thing, however, that Lea hasn’t done: watch the Glee episode dedicated to Cory.

Lea Michele reveals why she’s steered clear of tribute episode

During her An Evening With Lea Michele: Life in Music tour, the Cannonball singer admitted she has never watched Glee’s episode honoring her late ex-boyfriend, titled The Quarterback.

“I have never watched the episode, it’s the only one I have not seen because I think if I don’t watch it, I think it just kind of feels like Finn is still there.”

Fighting back the tears, the 35-year-old reflected on the difficulty to select a song for The Quarterback, which focused on the effect of Finn’s death on the other protagonists. Finn’s cause of death was never specified in the episode.

Lea eventually settled on Adele’s Make You Feel My Love, though she found it challenging to find a track that “said everything” about her on and off-screen feelings for Finn and Cory.

“How can I pick a song that says everything? I couldn’t even remember what I was listening to at the time. Nothing, I was just in such a hole.”

Lea ensures Cory lives on in memory with social media tributes

2015

Two years after his unexpected passing, the actress tweeted: “Today we remember the laughter and joy you brought into our lives every day. We think of you always and love you so.” It was accompanied by a photo of Cory peacefully driving as the sun beamed through the window.

2017

For Cory’s fourth death anniversary, Lea posted a black-and-white polaroid of the pair, taken at the exclusive members club Soho House.

“Hard to believe it’s been 4 years… We miss you C… love you more,” she wrote.

2018

The Scream Queens alum kept it simple with a quote reading: “There are some who bring a light so great to the world, that even after they have gone, the light remains.” It was clearly aimed at Cory since the tweet was posted on July 13.

If you’ve been affected by this story you can contact American Addiction Centers on (877) 686-7688 or Talk To Frank on 0300 123 6600 in the UK.

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